After all, we only have ourselves who can gives the exact amount of love that we expect.
I was had a great convo with my sweetest mutual friend from Medium. She told me out about her question over what does it feels to be when we got the same amount of love that we gave to other people? She said that why is it so hard for us to get the same love that we actually gave to other people? Why do we have to mourning over the love that felt like we already gave it to the wrong people?
I’ve had realized and learned so far from those conversation, that no matter how much we gave love to other people, either our family, friends, partner, or acquaintance, we can’t demand or expecting they’d give the same exact amount of love like we gave to them. As simple as they just can’t granted the amount of love that we expect. I learned it from how I should’ve least my own expectation by giving love to the people arounds me. I had to anticipated that no matter how much we can love deeply those people that take a special place in our life, we can’t expect they would give the same love that we gave. They have no idea how’s exactly to give the love that you surely imagined.
I knew that sometimes us with no doubts would give our love naturally to the people whom we loved most, however it’s not like we’re expecting them to do the same thing to us. Its hurt to know that when we thought we almost giving everything, our sincere love, kindness, praise, affection, and pride towards the people that we thought they were the right people, turns out they can be the one who never understand you that “giving a boundless love is part of your nature” and they thought we were too passionate over love. When actually, when it comes to love and loving, it’s normal to be passionate, isn’t it?
When we love someone doesn’t it feel like you would’ve chose to loved them completely and unconditionally? When they ever did hurt you in times, when you both ever had those worst battles, when there’s a time when you felt like their nature seems didn’t connected with you, yet you’d end up still bring the same love like the first time you knew them personally.
Because after all, you choose to not give up over love easily. In the end, you’ll end up choose to forgive each other after those pain, you both also choose to fixed it up those worst battles, and it’ll comes again to the time when you felt like he’s/she’s the one for you.
Even though, you realized there some spaces that exists in your heart contained those pieces that haven’t healed yet. Sometimes we do love them completely, passionately and unconditionally but they’d think we were too much over love, they thought that what we only wanted was a lovey-dovey despite everything. Perhaps, we’ve been pouring our love towards the wrong person.
Love supposed to be have a limit, but only when you’re thinking it is. Why supposed to be a limit when we can love fully?
I knew, that doing something that too much isn’t that good though. In the end love will leads you to grief, no matter what. Thus, as long as you’re doing it naturally and unconditionally, why can’t it be something that turns to beauty? Even though, the idea of love sometimes can changed ourselves in person.
But, love is love. You can’t judge someone by the way they’re giving their love either naturally or passionately. Love isn’t something that supposed to be the first thing that hurt you. They existed because you’re worth for it and you deserve it. There are people who’ve been always passionately over love, they always seeks over the idea of love itself, learned over it, grieving over it. There’s also people who’s give their love naturally, with no hesitance, with no rush, with no worries over whether love would affect them in the future.
It isn’t something that supposed for you to questioning about love that you already gave. When you pouring your love passionately, and they didn’t end up do the same thing to you, then it’s not your fault. Perhaps, you’re pouring it down to the wrong place. Hence, you’ll get the amount of love only from your own self. No one can exactly know the way you give your own love to other people. The only key is in you and your deepest heart.
A gentle reminder that no one can loving us better than ourselves. No one can understand the exactly us better than ourselves. It’s okay to be passionate over love, but remember when you’re giving love to someone, “Love isn’t something that supposed to be the first thing that hurt you the most”. After all, grief will always be the love’s souvenir.
