To be in love is to be grieving.

ailsya avriel
3 min readSep 8, 2024

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Love Letter (1991)

What the first thing that you expect from loving someone? What did you expect from own a special relationship with someone? A perfectness? Or genuine feeling? Own a relationship with someone or having feeling that you named it ‘love’, there’s actually nothing perfect if we hadn’t recognize the purpose itself. We seeking for affection thru love, we’re seeking for hope thru love, we’re seeking some pleasure from love, aren’t we? People have their kind of goal to be in love.

But when life put us down right on the place that unrecognized for us, what should we do, then? When we never recognize what the real love is, how love supposed to treated us in real life? We lost. When we expect life would give the cutie patootie relationship, yet life will give us the realness of how love can affect us in such many ways. All that we can do is just expecting. When it turns out happens vice versa, you’re not anticipating for it to be happened that way.

Love isn’t a thing that has to be perfect when it comes to your life. Love is just like us. It can grows too in every single times. They’re growing from the unfamiliar thing, then ended up to be something that you can’t push them away from your life and being something that hinged in your life. Love can affects us in so many ways that we couldn’t expect. Sometimes they did treated us in good ways yet also in so many bad ways.

All we can ever expect is to planted them and let them growing by themselves. Believe in love means believe that it can lead us to learn many things too. Love taught us what it feels to be hurt, what it feels to be grieving, what it feels to be neglected, what it feels to be lonely, what it feels to be happy, grateful, n so many other things. There’s no relationship or even love that supposed to be perfect, they all grows by the time to time.

When you expecting that love or owning relationship will gonna be perfect from the start, you’re genuinely wrong, dear. Owning relationship is like creating such a bond with someone you love, you both created it together, then both of you also grow from it slowly. It’ll pass many kinds of arguments, fights, and things that you probably never anticipate for that to come.

When we expect from love then it same as like preparing ourselves for creating griefs in our life.

Because they said “Grief is one of the consequences of being in love with someone”. That’s how love might affect us in real life. Because we’d never can judge which love that is perfect or otherwise. But, what we know is being in love means that we already trust ourselves to get hurt, to anticipating of being in pain. Because a love that is perfect doesn’t officially exist, a perfect love would exist when they didn’t expect it to be perfect anymore, yet a love that is genuine.

There’s no relationship without the ups and downs, to carry it to be genuine is to pass all over the rainbow and the storms.

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ailsya avriel
ailsya avriel

Written by ailsya avriel

sometimes i write for people, sometimes i write for myself. reach me on ig @ailsyaavriel ^^